Happy or Unhappy...?

I am commonly accused of being unhappy and always having a problem with something, by my best friend. Which I can partly see why she believes that, however am I suppose to do things I dont want to do?

Often times I find myself agreeing to going out, or being with our friends and then at the last second I decide its probably not the smartest idea for me. Then I become in a bind, do I go and spend my time and money on the exact opposite of things I need to be? Or do I do what I know is right for myself and stay in to avoid spending money?

I hate that I have an opinion on most situations, it typically gets me in trouble with a friend or two, or even my parents. However, I am just someone that is not going to do something I dont want to do because its what everyone else is  doing. For example, tonight my best friend and I got invited to go eat dinner with two of our friends. Later in the evening, I found out the place we would be going to eat, (being a college kid means your automatically tight on spending) and it was a place I have been several times and CAN NOT find anything I enjoy on the menu. So all in all, I decided that going and spending money on something that I did not deem worthy put me in a situation of having an opinion and getting people up set with me. After I said that I did not want to go anymore, because of the location, they then offered for me to pick the restaurant.  I hate that! I hate that I was the person who couldnt just go with the flow and I changed the plans, but Im not about to just spit out money that I dont have. Despite their offer of me picking the restaurant, I still number one, found it not necessary  to spend money on going out to eat, and number two, because I hate that I caused a problem, I want them to go where they wanted to go.

I hate that others look at me as unhappy because I always have an opinion and dont just go with the flow, but I believe that everyone should do what is going to better their lives and friends, will follow. Friends can come and go, but the decisions you make for yourself will last forever. I am truly sorry to any and everyone that I have ever made feel bad because of my choices. Just know that Im making decisions that you might think of my unhappy for, but I am making that choice to make me happy.


ON A DIFFERENT NOTE- (reference the last post first)

This weekend was amazing, I got to spend time with him. I met his friends, he met mine. I took him on the biggest thrill of his life.... sneaking out of the hotel past what time he was allowed to leave  and brought him to the dorms.  Took him to a bar, took him to see my favorite band play (Eli Young Band), taught him how to two- step. It was perfect! It all went as planned. But for now, he still remains my secret lover.

Just soaking up the way of life,
Lauren S